Your wrestler checks their opponent's TrackWrestling profile: State champion, 35-2 record, ranked nationally. Instantly, their demeanor changes. Stomach drops, tightness in the chest, breathing shallows, that confident warm-up energy evaporates. Or maybe it's a text from a teammate: "Dude, your opponent just teched someone in 45 seconds." Or perhaps it's their own mind: "I don't feel confident today. I'm such a head case. I'm going to lose."

"Tough it out." "Don't be soft." "The Champs don't complain." "Leave your emotions at the door."

Just because we have used language and trained wrestlers to “check their emotions,” it does not mean that we have created emotion-less robots. Athletes are not robots, and they do not perform on command without the right tools. They are complex humans like everyone else. And it is time we acknowledged that athletes are ALLOWED to have emotions and it isn’t going to be a threat to their performance. The very thing that is a threat to performance, is creating an environment where athletes push emotions down only for them to escape at the wrong time: in the middle of a high-tension match situation.

If you're a wrestling parent, you're not just watching from the bleachers, you’re in it. The stress, the hope, the hard conversations, the quiet car rides home. And let’s be honest, sometimes it's hard to know if you're helping or accidentally adding pressure.

Here’s what most people don’t talk about: support isn't about doing more. It’s about doing it differently.

In competitive sports, the mind is just as important as the body. Coaches know the importance of strength, conditioning, and technique, but mental performance is often an underdeveloped area for both the athlete and the coach. As times shift and we’ve become more aware of what creates a well rounded athlete ready to perform at high levels, so must we shift into a new phase of education for coaches. Integrating mindfulness and mental training into your team's routine can help athletes stay calm under pressure, perform with clarity, and build stronger team bonds.

As athletes, we all have our fears—those little voices in our heads that say, “What if I mess up?” or “What if I lose?” Whether it’s freezing up on the mat, letting ourselves down, or worrying about disappointing our coaches, fear is something we wrestle with every day. And the truth is, it doesn’t just go away as you get better at the sport. In fact, those fears can get louder. But here’s the game-changer: you don’t have to get rid of them. You just have to learn how to live with them.