In a few weeks, I’ll begin my last season as a collegiate wrestler. Eight years have passed since I first stepped on the mat. Since then, I’ve watched women’s wrestling boom in popularity. At the high school level, the number of high school girls participating has more than doubled in the last five years.¹ And earlier this year, the NCAA officially sanctioned women’s wrestling as its 91st sport.² Tournaments are expanding, rosters are filling, and teams that once had one or two girls now have entire starting lineups. This is a historic moment. 

Your wrestler checks their opponent's TrackWrestling profile: State champion, 35-2 record, ranked nationally. Instantly, their demeanor changes. Stomach drops, tightness in the chest, breathing shallows, that confident warm-up energy evaporates. Or maybe it's a text from a teammate: "Dude, your opponent just teched someone in 45 seconds." Or perhaps it's their own mind: "I don't feel confident today. I'm such a head case. I'm going to lose."

"Tough it out." "Don't be soft." "The Champs don't complain." "Leave your emotions at the door."

Just because we have used language and trained wrestlers to “check their emotions,” it does not mean that we have created emotion-less robots. Athletes are not robots, and they do not perform on command without the right tools. They are complex humans like everyone else. And it is time we acknowledged that athletes are ALLOWED to have emotions and it isn’t going to be a threat to their performance. The very thing that is a threat to performance, is creating an environment where athletes push emotions down only for them to escape at the wrong time: in the middle of a high-tension match situation.

Coaching girls isn't the same as coaching boys. But most people don't realize that until they're in the thick of it. For Emily and Pete Dorman from No Excuses Sportswear, stepping into the world of girls wrestling opened their eyes to what was missing. Not only with proper and well fitting gear for girls, but also how we support and foster female athletes so they thrive. This conversation isn't just about singlets. It's about shifting the culture, raising the standard, and showing girls that they deserve more than being included. They deserve to be centered.

If you're a wrestling parent, you're not just watching from the bleachers, you’re in it. The stress, the hope, the hard conversations, the quiet car rides home. And let’s be honest, sometimes it's hard to know if you're helping or accidentally adding pressure.

Here’s what most people don’t talk about: support isn't about doing more. It’s about doing it differently.

There’s a moment every wrestling parent knows: your daughter’s pacing near the mat, headphones on, zoned in. You say, “Good luck! So proud! Go get ’em!” And in return… an eye roll. Oof. It stings.

But here’s the truth: she’s not ungrateful. She’s overwhelmed. What she needs in that moment isn’t a pep talk, but a space to stay focused. Girls in wrestling are navigating intensity, nerves, and the heavy pressure to perform. Underneath the singlet and headgear is a young athlete trying to stay calm, stay confident, and stay in control. Parents can learn to provide an environment that helps their athlete thrive at competition.

When my daughter first stepped into a wrestling room, I felt the deep respect this sport commands. Its tradition, toughness, and discipline have shaped generations of athletes. As a teacher, I’ve always valued the life lessons wrestling can offer: grit, resilience, accountability. But I also saw clearly that the system wasn’t built with girls in mind. From coaching to culture to uniforms, the unspoken message was that girls could participate, but only if they adapted to a model designed for boys. I’ve seen this from every angle: the educator, the parent, the coach, and now the advocate. And while I appreciate where the sport has come from, I’m determined to help shape where it goes next, into a future that makes room for every girl who wants to step on the mat.

At 16 years old, I was a confused sophomore in high school. I was struggling to settle on a clear vision for my life, worried about fitting in, and constantly stuck with indecision. I didn’t feel confident in who I was, and I certainly didn’t think I’d end up becoming a professional wrestler for Team USA.

And yet, here I am.

But the path here hasn’t been linear. It’s been full of uncertainty, painful setbacks, and moments of deep questioning. Through it all, one thing has remained constant: God has been with me every step of the way, even in the depths of my sorrows.

Conversations about food and weight are some of the most sensitive topics you'll ever have with your daughter. And in a weight class sport like wrestling, they will be unavoidable. These discussions are powerful, and can help build her confidence and long-term health. In my own opinion, protecting your wrestler’s health is the most important investment you could make.

There’s a difference between extreme weight cutting and managing weight—and your team culture determines which one shows up.

As a coach, you shape more than technique and tactics. You set the tone for how your athletes view their bodies, food, and the pressure to "make weight." Coaches of female wrestlers must be hyper aware of the increased risk of eating disorders. High school female athletes are particularly vulnerable to eating disorders, with studies indicating that up to 50% of female high school athletes exhibit disordered eating behaviors, and 20–60% of female college athletes are affected.

You hug her after weigh-ins. She made it. She’s relieved—you’re relieved. But deep down, something feels off. Her eyes look tired. She barely spoke this morning. And you're not sure if you're more proud… or worried.

In wrestling, success is often measured in ounces. That number on the scale can determine everything: a starting spot, a shot at state, a future in the sport. For parents, it’s hard not to get caught up in it. We all want the best for our kids—to see them thrive, compete, win. But sometimes, the cost of “making weight” is invisible until it becomes too heavy to carry.

In a groundbreaking move, New York has become the first state in the U.S. to sanction girls' high school wrestling as freestyle instead of folkstyle. This historic decision aligns with the style used in women's college wrestling, providing a seamless pipeline for young athletes aspiring to compete at higher levels. Despite facing significant skepticism, New York's bold step marks a pivotal moment in the evolution of girl's and women's wrestling.

We are often our own worst enemies with healed injuries. When we start noticing the inevitable progression towards competition nears closer and closer, and we start loosing our heads. Those last, critical steps towards a full recovery are missed, and we become anxious and over focused on being back to sport in full. What we don't realize is, we already have the tools in our pocket to be ready for competition. It is not the first time we are competing! But are our bodies ready to adapt to the demands we must place on it?